Of course, the other way around in addition to applies – people discover the chemistry develops healthier as almost every other regions of an effective dating make

Of course, the other way around in addition to applies – people discover the chemistry develops healthier as almost every other regions of an effective dating make

Compatibility is not binary, it’s a range. And you may areas of incompatibility don’t always imply one thing badpassion and Connection come into play in these experiences, conveyed because of the Correspondence.

Chemistry ‘s the wildcard: “Sometimes, you just need to be around each other because they just turn you into.” This is not always constantly sexual, but however, that element is tough to refuse. Also performing the bathroom together is connection plus arousing for almost all.

Of course, the opposite may appear, that you don’t like are as much as people, and you just do not know as to why, even though you share most other Cs. Performing lovers, “friends” or other daily activities between people will find a beneficial matchmaking as the five of one’s five Cs work out, but chemistry is needed to ignite relationship. How come “chemistry” is the wildcard is basically because it can trump all other C’s. That is, some one will get are nevertheless to each other for it humanistic urge, even with the insufficient functional activities that other Cs always assume.

The situation that have chemistry is the inconsistency. It is far from fixed, is actually susceptible to alter (especially in the beginning of a relationship), and certainly will quickly turn in the event that almost every other Cs aren’t coming to each other. It’s possible to getting highly about anybody in the beginning, but in a different way seven days later, or less than another type of gang of standards.

This latter circumstances might have been the cornerstone on “family members basic” idea, where the top matchmaking are those you to begin because the household members. Although this is an intimate insight, it’s smaller genuine while the cultural norms develop and people be much more “permissive” without the romantic overtures.

Because of this dating is hard – somebody often lay a good disproportionate weighting towards initially biochemistry reading (either in guidelines), failing woefully to understand that a moment possibility have a tendency to returns an incredibly different understand. Too many matchmaking prevent too rapidly since go out wasn’t given to look for in which the chemistry anywhere between some body best swedish dating sites stabilizes. Which volatility is simply once the most other Cs you want knowledge so you can inform you on their own. Once the people select almost every other common aspects of being compatible as well as their telecommunications looks is scintillating, biochemistry has a tendency to grow.

All the Cs commonly digital in nature; it lie along a range, and might increase and you may slide temporally, for instance the chart regarding an audio equalizer because musical thumps.

Inequalities aren’t necessarily harmful to a romance – indeed, the majority of people collaborate because of them (or use them to compliment connection)

Experiences between folks are required to pick in which averages slide, in which isolating lines anywhere between people emerge. When evaluating prospective people, or working using problematic times in the a reputable relationships, just emphasizing procedures and you may terms and conditions due to the fact books to help you often means otherwise repair a love is just too simplistic. People will almost always instinctively reply to real time stimuli playing with user friendly, absolute solutions, which are those found on the Five Cs.

If you find yourself no relationship is most beneficial, an educated relationship are those in which men and women are ready to ensure it is on their own to stretch just a little into benefit of the fresh new matchmaking. Brand new desire adjust is really what solves issues and causes a healthier bi-directional bond. This will be a procedure that means partnership and you will communication, however, whoever motivations is grounded on a provided feeling of compassion on the most other, a compatibility out of income, and a main biochemistry.

Of several who are suffering from emotional traumas, personal tragedies, household members histories, rational dysfunctions otherwise physical disabilities, will turn-to people who sometimes share or support those need. By meaning, one other cluster will be the types of prepared to do so, and/or relationship would not past a lot of time.

The 5 Cs are created in order to teach very first important characteristics you to definitely, as a whole, dictate matchmaking effects

If as an alternative, the new “comedian-in-training” is offered adequate records into a subject, in which they could know about the newest understated, perhaps paradoxical subtleties out of a familiar sense, they up coming read what is actually comedy regarding procedure, it is therefore more likely they are able to submit a real-sounding monologue.

It turns out, sometimes spouse have awry need, therefore the get it done may be filled which have rate bumps across the ways. And sure, someone shall be only “responsible” inside a conflict, and it requires a healthier notice-esteem become happy to undertake are entirely incorrect whenever like criteria apply. (In the event that enough believe can be acquired between your functions, often people are certain to get reduced anxiety about stating a full-throated mea culpa and you will express themselves accordingly.)

Brand new most frightening element of relationship was the implication away from permanence. Very which make use of the label “commitment” enjoys confessed they were initial resistant to claiming they, while they had noticed firmly for the one to connection silentlymitment and you can faith are practically interchangeable within this perspective.

If you’re discussing big-image opinions and records could be a good base for almost all people, this is the Saturday and you will Thursday evenings that are most readily useful predicting equipment based on how well people get along with the day-to-date base. Special events dont pull man’s regular, absolute behaviors, especially when they won’t learn both well enough. From inside the a survey, you to topic told you, “Whenever you can come across a movie and also a, stimulating talk – it doesn’t matter if your agree on their studies – after that this will be a sign of strong being compatible. When you’re profoundly moved by a movie and your mate isn’t, then there is a possible to have incompatibility.”

இந்நூல் சுயமுன்னேற்ற நூல்களின் வரிசையில் பயனுள்ள, போற்றத்தக்க ஒரு புதுவரவு. பற்றாக்குறையோடு கூடிய அன்றாட வாழ்க்கையான இக்கரை வாழ்க்கையிலிருந்து சிறந்த, அபரிமிதமான அக்கரை வாழ்க்கைக்கு பயணிக்க ஒரு சிறந்த வழிக்காட்டி.

 வாழ்க்கையில் முன்னேற விழையும் எல்லோருடைய வெற்றிக்கும் இந்நூல் ஒரு திறவுகோலாக விளங்கும் என்பது திண்ணம்.
பல்வேறு பணிகளுக்கிடையே மக்களுக்கு, குறிப்பாக இளைஞர்களுக்கு மிகவும் அவசியமான இந்நூலை அழகான, எளிய தமிழ்நடையில் இயற்றி அளித்த ஆசிரியருக்கு பாராட்டுக்கள். அவர் பணி மேலும் சிறக்கட்டும்!

 

Dr.R.S.Raghavan
Dr.R.S.Raghavan

ஒரு நல்ல புத்தகத்தின் அடையாளம் படிக்கத் தொடங்கியவுடன் கீழே வைக்காமல் கடைசிப் பக்கம் வரை படிக்க வைப்பதே. தங்களது “இக்கரையா? அக்கரையா?” என்ற புத்தகம் எனக்கு அந்த அனுபவத்தைத் தந்தது. இது மிகவும் அருமையான சுயமுன்னேற்ற வகை புத்தகம்.

தொழில் முறையில் ஆடிட்டராக உள்ள நீங்கள் அருமையாக ஆங்கிலத்தில் எழுத முடியுமென்றாலும், தமிழ் வாசகர்களுக்குப் புதிய சிந்தனைகளைத் தரவேண்டும் என்பதற்காகவே இந்த நூலைத் தமிழில் எழுதியிருக்கிறீர்கள். அதனால் தமிழ் வாசகர்களின் நன்றிக்குரியவராகிறீர்கள்.

ஒரு வாசகன் என்ற முறையில், உங்களுக்கு என் பாராட்டையும், நன்றியையும் தெரிவித்துக்கொள்கிறேன்.

Padmashri. Dr. Nalli Kuppuswami Chetti
Padmashri. Dr. Nalli Kuppuswami Chetti(Partner M/S. Nalli Chinnasami Chetty)

திரு.ஈ.பி.திருமலை தொழில் துறையில் தனக்கென ஓர் இடத்தைப்பெற்றவர். அவரது முயற்சியும் மனித பண்பாடும் அவரை வெற்றியின் உச்சத்தை அடைய உதவியது. முற்போக்கான சிந்தனை, முரண்பாடற்ற நோக்கம், எதிலும் யதார்த்தத்தையும் உண்மையையும் உணரக்கூடிய அறிவு இவைகள் இவரது அடிப்படை ஆற்றல்கள். 

அவரது 40 ஆண்டுகளுக்கும் மேற்பட்ட அனுபவங்களின் தெள்ளிய சாராம்சம்தான் இவரது படைப்பு ‘இக்கரையா? அக்கரையா?’

சுவைபட எழுதியிருக்கிறார். அறிவுப்பூர்வமான புத்தகங்களின் நடுவில் இப்புத்தகம் தனித்து மிளிரும் என்பதில் எந்தவித ஐயமும் இல்லை. திரு.ஈ.பி.திருமலை அவர்களது இம்முயற்சி பாராட்டத்தக்கது. அவர்களுக்கு மனப்பூர்வமான வாழ்த்துக்கள்!

Shri. V.V.Sundaram
Shri. V.V.Sundaram(Cleveland Thyagaraja Festival)